Finding it hard...

This is the season of Thanksgiving and delight in all that God has done. He has done a lot!

For me though this season is always shadowed by mini bursts of depression and darker days. The weather and inability to be outside plays a part but I also just think its a cycle my body has been in for a few years. Its nothing too concerning but I am always aware of how I can to boost my spirits and brighten my days.

A few things have added to this couple year cycle. 1.) life changes, no matter how wonderful they can cause stress 2.) election and most of the dooms-dayers surrounding the future of our country and impending fiscal cliff 3.) taking care of a sick Bumba, and hubby as of late

I have always struggled with worrying. Something that was more nurture than nature. How will we survive if there is a fiscal cliff? What will happen to all our savings? Did I pick the right baby food for E? Am I 'working' hard enough at home? Will we be affected by the health care reform, since we are on private insurance through Chris's work? What if all  my worrying affects Elaina? What if things do get worse? What exactly is worse? What if Chris looses his job in January with all the sequestration (since there has been no department of defense budget in a couple years)? What if our new furnace exploded (like that family on the news)? What if the show Revolution comes true (I do not watch that show, only know the premise)?

 WHAT IF I TRUSTED GOD? ALL THE TIME!!!!


Like I said in a previous post I see my need for God in a new way. The need has always been there, I just cant be lazy in getting my heart, mind and actions right before God. I have little eyes watching, feeling and experiencing my issues.

A few years back I was in counseling and Andrea asked me, 'what would you say to a little child if they were worrying?'..."I'd probably says....its okay, don't worry. (in a calm, reassuring voice)...God loves us so much and cares for us. We can trust  him...I know its hard. I love you and am here for you". She reminded me that this is how God talks to us. In a way which reassures us and gives us his PEACE! If we let it.

This Thanksgiving Im honestly grateful for struggle and the chance to deepen my walk & prayer life with Christ. Proclaming truth and working daily to live it out.  There will always be things to worry about. But God has given me clear, defined tasks that he wants me to care for and when I worry those things get shadowed. I want them to be a the forefront.

Not sure if you struggle with worry, doubt, depression, darker days or fear. Here are a few things that  help me.

~Working out
~Listening to music
~Memorizing scripture
~Getting out of the house, even to go to Whole Foods or Target
~Seeing friends
~Being outside (getting out of the house)
~Talking to family


I have taken a few natural supplements that have helped
~Star of Bethlehem (best one I have found!)
~Gaba
~5HTP
~Vitamin B complex


Struggling helps us connect with others who are broken, lost and needing hope. As a believer I have true Hope and through these struggle I can connect and be more real with others.